So This Is Duke

I used to think that high school was when you "played along to get along". And then, once you hit university, or work, you stood up for what was right. I guess the women's lacrosse team at Duke doesn't see it that way. You see, some guys from the men's team are accused of rape. And these plucky ladies have decided, before any trial, to declare that the entire men's team is innocent~!

Dis worl' was made in jiss six days,
An' finished up in various ways;
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land!
Dey den made Dixie trim and nice,
But Adam called it "paradise,"
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land!

-- Daniel Decatur Emmett,

Emmet said
"When it's cold we yearn to be south of the Mason and Dixon line, or in Dixie, where the weather is fair and mild. When things aren't going well where you are, you wish you were in Dixie -- in Dixie -- in Dixie."

The women's lacrosse team from Duke is definitely south of the Mason and Dixon line. In Dixie -- In Dixie.

Turn away.

Accountable?

globeandmail.com : Attack on Afghan civilians 'unfortunate': PM:

"Prime Minister Stephen Harper says an air attack by coalition forces that killed a number of civilians in Afghanistan this week was 'unfortunate.'
Mr. Harper admits the tragedy won't help the efforts of Canadian and other troops to bring peace to the war-torn region."

First of all, "Unfortunate"? Let that roll around in your brain pan for a bit. If the fact that innocent people were blown-up rates "unfortunate" on your scale, then you may be ready for a job as a Woolworth's mannequin.

Secondly, if we are in command, and this happened under our watch, shouldn't we say sorry? Shouldn't we "leather up", say we fucked up, and will try to do better? Or is this part of the overt agenda (® JimDandy) of never say sorry, never back down? Luckily, we can say that it's not our fault because "[Harper] says he has no reason to believe there was any Canadian involvement in the attack because Canadian troops aren't involved in air missions."

We are in command of the south, but not of the air space...so it is a bit like Newfoundland. Can we get the RCMP to guard our eastern anti-aircraft gun before the Taliban kidnaps Farley Mowat and compels him to fire on U.S. planes? Just as a precaution. Farley's cool. He likes cops.

So to sum up - we are put in charge; people die under our charge; we say "fuck it". Is this how these nouveau-Albertan, tougher-than-leather conservatives plan on holding the government's feet to the fire? Is this (dare I utter the phrase) common sense?

Preston Manning is turning over in his bed right now.

Pat Robertson Is A Charlatan~!

Gentle reader, I come to you today with a sad heart. For it seems the work of the Charlatan! and the Snake Oil Salesman! has come to sully the good name of Physical Culture. By grace of the daily periodical penned by a fellow Canadian I was directed to a pamphlet most vexing to my heart. Deep within the land of the 13 colonies lives a Scoundrel~! by name of Pat Robertson. Said blackguard has claimed to lift 2,000 pounds Imperial by way of his lower extremities! I say hogwash to to this swindler. Even the great Hackenschmidt was never able to best that feat in his eponymous lift.

The Great Hackenschmidt in his prime

I dare say that Robertson has yet to put eyes upon even the lightest kettlebell or set hands upon a dumbbell to this point in his life. His claims reak of another miscreant, that of the odious Sri Chimnoy.

I say that until Pat furnishes moving picture proof of his strength and virility (are you listening Mr. Edison?) in the fields of Gymnastic~! and Physical Culture~! that he has no place with the legendary heroes of this most salubrious undertaking. They are presented below for your edification.

Respectfully,

Frank A. Gotch,
World Wreftling Champion

The Immortal Louis Cyr

Les Frères Meccane

The Legendary Cyclope~!

The One and Only - Sandow~!

Worst Movie Ever

You have to find 20 minutes in your sad life to see The Virgin Queen of St. Francis High.

I am almost too giddy to describe the horror within. This wonderful celluloid dream is about a high school bet - can our hero lure the Virgin Princess~! to the cabins in Banff for nooky! Oh sweet Jesus - this is Miami Vice mixed with Top Gun and anything starring Joan Cusack or Jeremy Piven. All 80s clothes and shades, done on a dirt road north of Okotoks. Search it out.


Look to Bravo or Showcase or other such craptastic broadcasters. Then request a refund.