This Calgary Herald story reports that the funniest joke of all time was authored by Spike "Shwip Shwip Shwee" Milligan. Check it out below and see if you can top it.
Funniest joke traced to author
CanWest News Service
Friday, June 09, 2006
Detective work by a professor investigating the psychology of humour has revealed Spike Milligan authored the world's funniest joke.
Five years ago, Prof. Richard Wiseman, of the University of Hertfordshire, did an online experiment in which 300,000 people from around the world took part in LaughLab, where they voted for the best gag.
At the Cheltenham Science Festival on Thursday, Prof. Wiseman said he has discovered it was almost certainly written by Milligan, who stared with Peter Sellers in the 1950s British comedy The Goon Show, where the joke first appeared.
The joke runs as follows: Two hunters are out in the woods in New Jersey when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"
© The Calgary Herald 2006
Friday, June 09, 2006
Janet Jackson - Them Drugs is Fantastic!
Because at 40 it really is easy to lose 60 pounds. Especially if you only eat 1000 calories a day.
Yeah right. Hello future thyroid problems.
Janet in February :
Janet now:
Yeah right. Hello future thyroid problems.
Janet in February :
Janet now:
MacTavish Gives Up Belief In Skill
My first reaction was "Craig MacTavish went to Westminster?" Followed by, "We have a school pin?". And it is a shame that a once-powerful hockey program has gone the way of the dodo. I guess that is something else we can blame on immigration. At least the basketball program is doing well. And the gang-fighting club.
Ann Coulter To Base - Read But Don't Think
From the first chapter of Godless by Andy Kaufman in drag :
As a matter of faith, liberals believe: Darwinism is a fact, people are born gay...If people are born gay, why hasn’t Darwinism weeded out people who don’t reproduce?
That pretty much is all you need to know about the intellectual deficit that has made Coulter rich. You can read more here; if you are a frightened blowhard, you will love it. For anyone else with a functioning, rational brain, just skip it. Though you might enjoy the commentors, who make Coulter's case that there is no such thing as I.Q.
As a matter of faith, liberals believe: Darwinism is a fact, people are born gay...If people are born gay, why hasn’t Darwinism weeded out people who don’t reproduce?
That pretty much is all you need to know about the intellectual deficit that has made Coulter rich. You can read more here; if you are a frightened blowhard, you will love it. For anyone else with a functioning, rational brain, just skip it. Though you might enjoy the commentors, who make Coulter's case that there is no such thing as I.Q.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Bill O'Reilly's Handmaiden a Class Act
This from the Calgary Herald. I caught Bill O'Reilly's act where he ambushes survivors of 9/11 victims and calls them unpatriotic. Anne Coulter who is a mean-spirited person at best seems to have carried on this agenda.
Right-wing author blasts 9/11 widows
The Associated Press
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Books - New York Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton lashed out at Ann Coulter for a "vicious, mean-spirited attack" on a group of outspoken 9/11 widows, whom the right-wing television pundit described as "self-obsessed" and enjoying their husbands' deaths.
Coulter wrote in a new book, Godless: The Church of Liberalism, that a group of New Jersey widows whose husbands perished in the World Trade Center act "as if the terrorist attacks happened only to them."
"I've never seen people enjoying their husbands' deaths so much," she added.
Rodham Clinton, who has felt Coulter's wrath over the years, responded angrily on Wednesday. "Perhaps her book should have been called Heartless," the senator said.
Coulter's criticism was aimed at four New Jersey women -- Kristen Breitweiser, Lorie Van Auken, Mindy Kleinberg and Patty Casazza.
They have spent the years since the 2001 terror attacks supporting an independent commission to examine government failures before the attack.
© The Calgary Herald 2006
Right-wing author blasts 9/11 widows
The Associated Press
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Books - New York Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton lashed out at Ann Coulter for a "vicious, mean-spirited attack" on a group of outspoken 9/11 widows, whom the right-wing television pundit described as "self-obsessed" and enjoying their husbands' deaths.
Coulter wrote in a new book, Godless: The Church of Liberalism, that a group of New Jersey widows whose husbands perished in the World Trade Center act "as if the terrorist attacks happened only to them."
"I've never seen people enjoying their husbands' deaths so much," she added.
Rodham Clinton, who has felt Coulter's wrath over the years, responded angrily on Wednesday. "Perhaps her book should have been called Heartless," the senator said.
Coulter's criticism was aimed at four New Jersey women -- Kristen Breitweiser, Lorie Van Auken, Mindy Kleinberg and Patty Casazza.
They have spent the years since the 2001 terror attacks supporting an independent commission to examine government failures before the attack.
© The Calgary Herald 2006
Monday, June 05, 2006
Batwoman Reinvented as Lesbian! Have Comic Guys Grown up and Become Dirty Ol' Men?
This from the editors of the Calgary Herald. They were already distraught about same sex marriage, now they are cluing in (but not quite there) that the "Boy Wonder" may have got his nickname for reasons other than fighting crime in tights...
Superheroes don't have sex
Calgary Herald
Monday, June 05, 2006
Holy political correctness, Batman! Batwoman is returning to DC Comics as a lesbian.
Why comic book characters need to have sexual orientation defies comprehension. They're drawings on a page. Characters such as Batwoman should just be superheroes and kids should have fun reading about their adventures.
It seems the trend that began with the Teletubbies and Sesame Street characters Bert and Ernie which, incredibly enough, saw supposedly mature adults engaged in fierce debate over puppets' and cartoon characters' sexual orientation, has resurfaced.
Perhaps it's too much to ask of our sex-obsessed society, but truly, not everything needs to be linked with what people do in their bedrooms. What's next -- Robin wasn't Batman's ward, but the victim of child sexual abuse by the pedophiliac Caped Crusader?
© The Calgary Herald 2006
Superheroes don't have sex
Calgary Herald
Monday, June 05, 2006
Holy political correctness, Batman! Batwoman is returning to DC Comics as a lesbian.
Why comic book characters need to have sexual orientation defies comprehension. They're drawings on a page. Characters such as Batwoman should just be superheroes and kids should have fun reading about their adventures.
It seems the trend that began with the Teletubbies and Sesame Street characters Bert and Ernie which, incredibly enough, saw supposedly mature adults engaged in fierce debate over puppets' and cartoon characters' sexual orientation, has resurfaced.
Perhaps it's too much to ask of our sex-obsessed society, but truly, not everything needs to be linked with what people do in their bedrooms. What's next -- Robin wasn't Batman's ward, but the victim of child sexual abuse by the pedophiliac Caped Crusader?
© The Calgary Herald 2006
Sunday, June 04, 2006
The WHA Is Back!
The National Hockey League's Stanley Cup Finals will be the first with both teams originating from the WHA. Just a fun fact.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)