Bees Ruin World Cup Opener

It has to be bees, it simply has too. I just don't want to believe that the headache that is starting behind my eyes is due to people producing one long droning buzz. I guess I can go without hearing the commentary, or have a headache for a month. Decisions, decisions.

Shorter me: Fuck you vuvuzela, fuck you with bees on it.

The Mind of the Right - It's All About Your Daddy

Let's skip past the self-hating Uncle Tom (sorry, Ted), the self-hating chicana (nice dye job, hope you fit in), the stereotypical racist biker (fag), the fat sweaty racist (they are legion), the self-hating latina Lupe Mareno and focus on a Mexican who thinks that America is only for anglo protestants. Amerika, Fuck Yah!

Who's My Daddy?

Skip on ahead to 5:29 and bathe in the authoritarian mindset. Ray is not going to give up his anglo heritage. Even though he isn't anglo. But he will sit on Russel Pearce's lap and suckle his nipples like a good boy.

Just Be Satisfied With the Tech You Have

We've all been saying it for years: "Where's my jetpack?" "Why don't we have jetpacks?" "We were promised jetpacks!" On and on we whine about fucking jet packs.

We are really smart apes. We shouldn't have jetpacks.




We do have cool wireless internet toys like the Ipod Touch, which is way cooler than a jet pack. Plus, it won't fly you into the ground at high speed.

You've seen people drive; you have yelled at them. I bet you think people can't control a fucking grocery cart. And let's not forget the lessons taught by Iron Man and Ms. Marvel about what can happen with repulsors, Kree-powered flight (or whatever the hell makes her fly) and the demon liquour.








What hope do we have of being a flying society without complete machine control? Once the auto manufacturers can figure out car AI, then we can have jet packs. Maybe in fifty years.

I promise.

The Songs Running Through Your Head

Those of you with children will well remember their obsession with repetition. "Read it again", "Let's watch it again!"

One of the current obsessions is the very lovely My Neighbour Totoro by Ghibli Studios. As a result of seemingly endless viewings, this song is emblazoned on my brain.

On the upside, when you sing it in the office, you can imagine you are riding a cat bus and heading off on another fantastic adventure with the fat tree troll.

What?




And no, my kids don't watch the Japanese version. So save your outrage.

Here, watch this, it'll cheer you up.